


Please Don't Change

by MagpiePair



Category: VIXX
Genre: Cha Hakyeon | N-centric, Gen, Guilt, Hurt/Comfort, Insecurity, POV Multiple, Team as Family
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-04
Updated: 2020-10-04
Packaged: 2021-03-08 02:40:52
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,488
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26818240
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MagpiePair/pseuds/MagpiePair
Summary: Hakyeon thinks he is annoying his group members with his overbearing behavior, and he tries to pull back on the nagging, the neck-chopping, the displays of affection.Of course, they get worried.
Relationships: Cha Hakyeon | N & Everyone, Cha Hakyeon | N & Han Sanghyuk | Hyuk, Cha Hakyeon | N & Jung Taekwoon | Leo, Cha Hakyeon | N & Kim Wonshik | Ravi, Cha Hakyeon | N & Lee Hongbin, Cha Hakyeon | N & Lee Jaehwan | Ken
Comments: 4
Kudos: 39





	Please Don't Change

**Author's Note:**

> Hey, all! Back with another super self-indulgent fic about my biases receiving love, fluff, and TLC after some hurt/comfort lolol
> 
> I hope you enjoy this one, and thank you for reading! 
> 
> (And yes we are ignoring Hongbin's departure because I want to)

It starts with something small. 

Hakyeon knows better than to give too much weight to his teammates’ joking reactions, or at least he thinks he does, but he chalks it up to a stressful week which stirs up his insecurities. After their busy schedules spark a seed of self-doubt, Hakyeon goes to give Wonshik one of his bear hugs, but the other pushes him off. He tries to brush it off like normal, even as he feels an unexplained pang in his heart. 

Maybe if that had been all, nothing else would have come of it. But one small moment seems to pile onto the next- Taekwoon complains about his smothering as well, and Jaehwan refers to one of his sentimental speeches as “the burdensome sappiness of an old man”- until Hakyeon can't help but think back on every moment prior in which the other members had expressed similar feelings.

Hakyeon knows he can be a bit much. He knows that he nags too much, that he is overly affectionate, that he is not one for personal space. Although rarely, he does sometimes feel self-conscious about this side of himself, because how couldn’t he? He is human, and it's impossible to not occasionally read into his groupmates' teasing as a form of rejection. This week, the feeling just comes a little stronger than other times.

Is he really so annoying, he finds himself wondering. Is he too overbearing? With his sensitivity at an all-time high, Hakyeon finds that he doesn’t want to face another harsh stare or unkind word because of his behavior. Doesn't want to make anyone else feel uncomfortable because Hakyeon can’t hold himself back or keep to himself. 

So he resolves to change.

\--

Wonshik is first alerted to a change in his leader first thing the next morning. When he hears the door to his room open, letting in a beam of light into the dark room and exposing the messiness of a busy young man’s floor, Wonshik groans and scrubs his hands over his face. He turns his head to look at Hakyeon- 

Only for the other to walk past him to slowly open the curtains. Wonshik stares after the man who has yet to speak, his sleep-addled brain coming into focus when Hakyeon finally approaches him. Yet, the other only gently shakes his shoulder and whispers, “It's time to get up,” before leaving the room.

Huh. Well, that was certainly different.

Normally upon waking him, Hakyeon would scold him about the state of his room or for staying up too late working on songs, earning grumbles and accusations of not being their mother in return. Normally, he would flop on top of his victim and refuse to move until they assented to getting out of bed.

Maybe Hakyeon is just feeling too tired to nag today. Wonshik tells himself this in part to swat away the weird feeling in his gut that arose upon seeing Hakyeon so quiet and reserved. He’s certain the other will be back to his usual self by mid-afternoon at the latest. 

\--

Wonshik was wrong, they find, as by the following day, everyone is clued into Hakyeon acting outright /bizarre/. 

Hongbin reflects on his strange behavior as they set up the Jenga tower for their V LIVE. Hakyeon has delivered not one neck chop, not even when Sanghyuk had practically been begging for one when he instantly knocked over their first attempt at assembling the Jenga tower. Sanghyuk had looked almost lost when Hakyeon had done nothing in response other than throw a teasingly exasperated look his way. “Be more careful, Hyukkie, hmm?” 

In fact, Hongbin realizes with an unexplained sinking feeling in his chest, Hakyeon hasn’t touched any of them all day.

Once the V Live gets going, Hongbin tries to get caught up in the spirit of competition instead, and it works for a little while. Then, the block Hongbin draws from the special Jenga set challenges him to answer what his members mean to him. Hongbin stammers through something very heartfelt, fighting off misty eyes in the process. “They’ve become as much a family to me as my parents back home. Their support means everything, and I couldn't imagine doing any of this without them.” And he means every word. Still, he is mentally rehearsing his disgusted expression in anticipation of Hakyeon grabbing his face and miming sloppy kisses on his cheek.

But Hakyeon is sitting all the way on the other side of the room, smiling innocently, instead. “Aw, so you do love us~! We love you, too,” he teases once he meets Hongbin’s eyes. 

The uneasy feeling in the pit of his stomach returns. Why does Hongbin find himself longing for Hakyeon’s typical dramatics? Why do his shoulders feel cold without Hakyeon’'s arm thrown over them? Why do the group’s usual antics seem somehow emptier than normal? 

Hongbin finds his own resolve counter to the one that Hakyeon had privately made a couple days before. Hongbin resolves to find out what is going on with their leader, and he resolves to /fix/ it. 

\--

Taekwoon has no idea how to broach this topic with Hakyeon. He considers the two of them to be close, often sharing their deepest wishes and darkest anxieties. Yet, Taekwoon realizes with a start that he himself rarely initiates such talks. He finds a lack of courage now as he wonders if his questioning Hakyeon’s recent behavior might come across as judgmental, or if his words might make Hakyeon retreat further. Hakyeon already feels too distant, even if he is right by their side. 

The members have spent so long pretending to be bothered by Hakyeon’s exuberant displays- how can they ask him why he stopped? How can they say they miss it? 

While Taekwoon has found himself hesitating, it seems that Jaehwan has decided to take matters into his own hands.

“Hakyeon!” he calls out, slinging an arm around the other's shoulder. Hakyeon tenses at the contact, and his eyes widen, looking not entirely unlike a deer in headlights. But it also looks to Taekwoon as though he unconsciously leans into the touch. 

“What's up?” he asks with a nervous laugh.

Jaehwan smiles and ruffles his hair. “Nothing, can't I just show my leader some appreciation?” 

Hakyeon bats his hand away from his head and smiles a little self-consciously. “You never have before.” 

Taekwoon just watches the exchange. He feels too shy to follow Jaehwan’s lead, but he wants to do something, too. “Your solo performance the other day was really nice,” he manages with a blush, and Hakyeon then looks even more flabbergasted. Is it that unusual for him to compliment Hakyeon? At the surprise in his gaze, Taekwoon feels a little bad. 

Hakyeon looks pleased by the attention, but he still ends up pushing Jaehwan off and walking away. Taekwoon and Jaehwan exchange looks of concern. This really isn’t like the other at all. 

If they want their regular annoying Hakyeon back, it seems they will really have to commit to making him open up. 

\--

Sanghyuk thinks Wonshik’s directness is praiseworthy.

After another couple days of the same frustratingly aloof treatment from Hakyeon, Wonshik marches up to the man himself and plants his feet in front of him with a pout. “Why didn’t you wake me up today?” he complains.

Hakyeon scoffs in disbelief. “I did!”

“No, you walked in and just told me to get up! Of course I fell right back asleep after that. You should have jumped on me like usual.”

Hakyeon opens and closes his mouth not unlike a fish. “I- I thought you hated that! You told me I was heavy and that it hurt!”

Wonshik’s childish indignation seems to subside slightly in the face of Hakyeon’s rather reasonable argument. He rubs the back of his neck sheepishly, admitting, “I don’t really /hate/ it... I guess my body sort of got used to it. It doesn’t know how to get up on its own now,” he says with a laugh. 

Sanghyuk sees his opportunity and chimes in, not all that smoothly, “Yeah, Hakyeon-hyung, you've been weird lately. Is something going on?” 

Although Sanghyuk hadn’t noticed them in the room prior, he suddenly sees their other members perk up from the corner of his eye, paying an inordinate amount of attention while awaiting Hakyeon’s response.

Their leader’s gaze falls to the floor. “Is it... good weird?”

Hongbin blinks once, twice. “…What?”

“I know I've made some changes recently... Has it been... good? Better, at least?”

Taekwoon speaks then. “What are you talking about?”

Hakyeon seems frustrated that they're not picking up on what he's saying, and Sanghyuk suddenly feels like they're having two separate conversations. “I've been trying to annoy you all less. So I stopped nagging and jumping on you all.”

Jaehwan lets out a strangled gasp. “/That's/ why you stopped doing those things? ‘Cause you thought we found it annoying?”

It is Hakyeon's turn to look confused. “Yes?? Don't you?”

“No!!” Wonshik cries out rather fiercely.

Sanghyuk feels his heart break a little. Hakyeon has been holding himself back because he thought they didn't like it? All those things that make him him, he repressed because he felt like a bother? They let him feel like he was in the wrong, like he was an annoyance to them, just for being himself? 

“I- What do you mean, ‘no’?! You always said-”

Sanghyuk isn’t going to let this go on any longer. He can’t bear to let Hakyeon spend another moment thinking this way. “Well, we shouldn’t have. We didn’t know you would take it seriously, but that’s not an excuse. We pile too much onto you without letting you know that we really like your company, and that we want you to hug us and scold us and play around with us when we’re brats. It’s the way you show you care, and I know I speak for all of us when I say we appreciate it. We’ve been really concerned and upset since you’ve stopped doing those things, and well… I guess it just tells us that we haven’t been showing you we care the same way that you always show us.”

Hakyeon looks startled. He blinks a little too quickly. “…You don’t have to say that just because I’ve been a little down, Hyukkie. I promise I can get used to acting less overbearing, so-”

“You’re not overbearing!” Hongbin interrupts. “Okay, you are, but I promise we like you that way. This has all been some wake-up call that we need to treat you better, alright? There is nothing that you need to change!” 

Hakyeon looks as though his mind is waging an internal war. “But- …really?”

“Yes,” Taekwoon answers. He sets a hesitant hand on Hakyeon’s shoulder, and Jaehwan follows suit. Sanghyuk stands awkwardly from his spot across the living room, wishing for all the world he had Hakyeon’s (usual) lack of reservations to rush forward and hold the man himself. 

But he has just resolved to show his affection more often, and so he smiles warmly and says, “Please. We want our huggy hyung back.” 

Hakyeon brightens at that. Although his movements are still reluctant, he gently returns Taekwoon and Jaehwan’s touches. “Okay,” he says.

And it feels like everything will be.

\--

Jaehwan is satisfied with the talk the members had yesterday, but he is not /at all/ satisfied with how Hakyeon had been feeling for the past week. Or perhaps even longer? Just because his groupmates were only clued in to his change in behavior a week ago does not mean Hakyeon had not been harboring similar thoughts for a while now.

And so he knows it is them that must make a change. And Jaehwan finds himself desperately /wanting/ to show appreciation, to return the affection Hakyeon always lavishes on them. 

He sets his own alarm bright and early in order to gently rouse Hakyeon from slumber. After entering the room, he instantly fusses over the other. When he sees Hakyeon wince after stretching, he asks, “Is your back feeling okay?” He follows up with an unrelated but still important, “Did you eat enough last night?” Hakyeon smiles softly and nods in affirmation to both questions. 

When the other members have all stirred and gathered in the dorm’s living room, Jaehwan sees that they all have similar ideas to himself. Hongbin and Sanghyuk sit right next to Hakyeon as they bicker over an activity for their rare free day. Finally, on the spoiled maknae’s suggestion, they agree to watch a movie. 

Although Sanghyuk is already navigating Netflix, Taekwoon checks in with Hakyeon, “Are you sure you’re okay with a movie? Isn’t this one too scary for you? Don’t try to act tough…” He even ruffles his hair, despite turning about three shades of red after the gesture.

Wonshik echoes his concern, adding, “Tell us if you want to switch the movie ‘cause you’re about to piss your pants or something.”

“Yah!” Hakyeon calls out. He winds up a fatal chop to Wonshik’s neck and settles in against Hongbin and Sanghyuk’s sides. Jaehwan feels a little jealous, so he drapes himself over their laps, and just like that, they watch the movie while cuddled together. Jaehwan thinks he could get used to this.

\--

Hakyeon has an easier time than he expects returning to his normal dynamic. He still finds it hard at times to believe their words, to believe that he’s not a pest to them and that they like his ways of showing affection. That he’s not too much.

But anytime he shows hesitance in leaning on them or teasing them, they reassure him. When his hand stops halfway on its trajectory to Jaehwan’s side, Jaehwan grabs his hand and completes the contact for him. When he fizzles out halfway through a rant about how Wonshik can’t just eat chips all the time, Wonshik waits encouragingly, even eventually provoking him into continuing his scolding with an especially provocative remark. Hakyeon finds he can’t second-guess himself too much when they are all at his heels showing their appreciation for his care and returning it tenfold.

That’s why it is not too long before he finds himself casually regaining their former rhythm. Hongbin and Sanghyuk look grateful and relieved when he throws himself onto their backs. Taekwoon offers up more hard-won praise of Hakyeon’s recent work ethic.

And Hakyeon’s smile stretches ever wider. He feels secure and warm. And he doesn’t feel (too) embarrassed when he vocalizes it a moment later: “You guys love me so much!” 

The others cry out in indignation, Wonshik and Hongbin calling out, “Shut up!” at the same time that Taekwoon wraps a protective arm around him, and as Jaehwan and Sanghyuk respond, “Yes, we do.” 

Hakyeon beams, and his gaze grows fierce as he turns on them. He has a lot of smooching and neck-chopping time to make up for, after all.


End file.
